I Did It Tom's Way

When you look back on your life do you think, like Frank Sinatra, that you did it your way?

That's what I thought until I analyzed my life and discovered, much to my surprise, that I Did It Tom's Way.

Characterize me if you will. Civil War buff, Cajun/Zydeco dancer, National Park lover . . . yup. But none of these were my original ideas.

Tom took me on a tour of Gettysburg. After a while I looked at him and said, "We were here," to which he agreed. I don't know why I said that, but I believed it and still do. Tom even looks like General Thomas Jackson aka Stonewall Jackson, a name that he earned at First Manassas -- or Bull Run, as the Union forces called it.





Go ahead, compare the photos. Am I right? What an amazing resemblance.

I always thought that Tom looked great with a beard. The story goes, he took his two young sons to the movies and a woman said, "Isn't that nice that Grampa is taking his grandkids to the movies." He went home and shaved the gray beard off and we haven't seen it since. I have wanted to shave off my white beard, but Sandy won't let me. She says I would look like Gramma Walton from The Waltons TV show. Not Grampa Walton. Even John Boy would probably agree.

Cajun/Zydeco dancer. Not my idea. Tom took us to our first festival in Rhode Island, the state where he was born, and Sandy and I were hooked. That was a long time ago, at Escoheag, and it changed our lives.

Speaking of Rhode Island, every Mardi Gras Ball we end the evening by going to Haven Brothers for hamburgs and fries. Did you think that was my original idea? As a kid Tom was a regular there, and he took us there the very first time. Federal Hill, Point Judith, Ninigret and Rhodes on the Pawtuxet. None of these were my idea originally, but thanks for thinking it was.

National Park lover. It was all his idea. First we hiked Yosemite, then Arches, then Canyonlands, then Tetons and Yellowstone, then Rocky Mountain National Park. I don't think we are done yet. He showed us Virginia City and the trails and lakes of Tahoe. Truckee California too. Tom lived in California for twenty years. He hiked Yosemite many times with the Sierra Club.

The first time we went to Yosemite we ate first at a Mexican restaurant called La Piñata. It was just south of LAX. It was awesome. When Sandy, Allan Sylvester and I went to Steve George's 50th birthday party, we of course ate at La Piñata. When the Adamses went to Yosemite they enjoyed the place so much they went twice. Mike Coleman from the Ultra Running Club was going to California with his Lauri. I told him about the restaurant. During the trip he suggested a GREAT Mexican restaurant. Lauri said, "You have never been to California before, how do you know where a great Mexican restaurant is?" They went to the restaurant in Burlingame and loved it. Bill Thibideaux, a former Navy buddy, was going out to California. I told him. He couldn't find it. Finally he asked someone and found out that, after 37 years, it had closed.

Tom and I have many other connections. He and Jeanette built a house on the lot next door to us here in Marshfield in 1980. One day Sandy and I were in the back yard. The Egan casa was under construction. We met at the fence. As Tom remembers it, I said, "Do you own a dog?"

They said NO.

I said, "We will get along just fine."

We did get along fine. That same night we went out for Mexican. We have been friends now for 30 years. Not around 30 years -- 30 YEARS.

Jeanette, a southern California girl, even taught Sandy how to make Mexican fideo soup. Now we think of the recipe as ours.

Through the Egans, we became fast friends with the Sylvesters and the Georges. Tom worked at a company in Boston with Allan Sylvester and Steve George. We were only friends here in Massachusetts for 5 years. But it is a strong connection. The Georges moved back to California. The Sylvesters moved to Vermont. And the Egans moved to Pennsylvania. When they all lived here, we had great fun. Mexican pool parties, New Years Eves, etc. We still get to see each other. We all show up for a son or daughter’s wedding, or one of our special birthdays, and we have been on vacations together.

Tom Egan and I have many other things that connect us. To start, we were born in the same month. Tom grew up in the projects and I grew up in a mill town.

We both love old western movies. Lonesome Dove: he called me the first night it was on and we were both hooked. Hell, most of America was. Anything that Robert Duvall does is OK with us. If I told you once, I have told you twice: rent Assassination Tango. We may be the only two people on the east coast who loved the movie Heavens Gate.

Lake George New York has a lot of history for both of us. We still vacation there. Around Boston no one knows Lake George. Well it is Yankee territory.

Telephone call one night. Bob. Tom. Best western gun battle ever. Open Range. End of conversation.

Tom is an avid reader. We pass each other books at Christmas and birthdays. It was Tom who let us all know about a great book that he had discovered. It was to be my Christmas present, but he couldn't wait and sent it in July. It was called Mayflower. It had a major affect on my other friends here in New England. The author, Nathaniel Philbrick, came to the Winslow house for a reading. It was so packed that people outside were trying to listen to him through the open windows. Most people were turned away.

I have read everything that there is to read on Buffalo Bill Cody. We swung off the exit near Denver once after visiting Leadville to see his gravesite. Tom had been there years ago with his father. I was overwhelmed with the place and ended up buying this Buffalo Bill jacket at Longview Point.



Bill wanted to be buried at Cody Wyoming, a town that he started. The city of Denver offered his wife $10,000 if she would bury him there instead, so she did. They didn't get along all that well. Once she showed up unannounced at a hotel where Bill was staying. The desk clerk told her the room number where Mr. and Mrs. Cody were registered. Bill was a ladies’ man. Even late in life he was something to see.



Cody cowboys threatened Denver that they would come and dig Bill up and bring him back to Wyoming. Denver responded by reburying Buffalo Bill under 20 feet of concrete. You can't make this stuff up.



When Tom and Jeanette visited Russia, he bought a Russian Officers cap from a little old lady down a side street. Jeanette said, "Tom, WHAT are you going to do with that hat?

Tom said, "It’s for Bob.”

Jeanette said, “Oh!”

My Polish grandfather was in the Russian Army.



What else? I ran 54,000 miles. Tom hockey skated 54,000 miles.

Later in life, Tom became a story teller while I became a story writer (sort of).





I cracked up when I received this mail recently and it sparked this blog. That's me as a project teenager at age 14. I can't wait until the royalties start pouring in.

As you can see, Tom has become a great storyteller. Even the famous Jay O'Callahan of Marshfield believes this. Check out all of Tom's other accomplishments. He is quite a guy and he is my friend.



I really think that T.P. has influenced me more in my life than anyone, and I wanted you and the rest of the world to know.

Bob Bacon